I have class in about 15 minutes and I still have a reading left to do, but who cares…about school.
Because blogs, or at least my blog, are intended for crappy writing and merry improvements, I’m just going to…talk, well more like write but you get it. I’ve realized in high school that my writing is extremely disorganized; however, I kind of just shoved that epiphany toward the back of my mind. I’m not sure if it was because I didn’t want to admit that maybe writing (despite having taken up several editor positions throughout the past years) is one of my weakest points. But the worst has yet to come. In fact, I actually know when my essays are disorganized, I get this really uncanny vibe. Yet I really don’t want to change what I have because I think in many ways if you sort of just read between the lines, you’ll totally get what I’m saying. You know what I’m saying?
Anyways, I’m taking this class called “Sexing Korea” which is about how gender stereotypes are grossly perpetuated in korean films/literature/music, etc. I really love this class and the professor is one of the nicest professors I’ve ever met. But, I’ve recently started to feel very uncomfortable sitting and participating in this class– thoughts of “is she judging me” or “should I work harder?” have been starting to bug me. I’m not sure if it’s because she is a new professor, but nobody in our class knows our grades (it’s already week 5). Yes, grades do not determine who you are blah blah blah, but when you sit in a class you really enjoy, knowing your grade can do you little harm. Out of fear and mostly confusion, I sent my professor a rather tragic email about how discouraged I feel and that any further clarification of protocols would be very much appreciated.
Final message: I’ve been buried under a pile of unending work– I can’t wait until this term is over!